Things I hate about everybody

The stuff below is not original, but then I don't want to reinvent the wheel anyways ;-)

People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the f*** is urs ? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

People who are willing to get off their bum to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*** yeah!
What good is a cake if u can't eat it DUMBO?

When people say "it's always the last place u look". Of course it is. Why the f*** wud u keep looking after u've found it? Do ppl do this? Who and where are they?

While watching a film when people say "Did u see that?"
No Tosser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor.

People who ask "Can I ask u a question?". Didn't really give me a choice... did ya?

When some commodity is "New & Improved!".
Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it. What shit were we using then?

When people say "Life is short". What the f***???
Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can u do that's longer?

When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?".
If the bus came would I be standing here, Knobhead?

People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So what did they used to be? Ears, Wellington boots?

When you are eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?'
NO! It's really revolting I always eat stuff I hate.

People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks, that's an image I really didn't need.

McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you unless you insert the 'Mc' before the item u are ordering..... It's has to be a McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger get blank looks........... Well I'll have a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you McTosser.

When you involved in a accident and someone asks 'Are you alright?'
Yes fine thanks, I'll just pick up my limbs and be off.